Life Change

I apologize being away so long. Since my last post, life has taken a new direction for our little family. But let me start at the beginning...

Jason has been very firm about not having any more children. It's hard for him to balance work and home as it is and the boys are definitely a challenge for us. I won't even get into the numerous financial reasons he has given me...which, when I stop being so stubborn totally make sense. So in December I gave up on the thought of having more children and made a promise to take the pill like a good girl (I had taken a 3 month break with the hope that I could convince Jason that we should have just one more baby).

The time for Scrap Etc came. I was so stressed at work, stressed about getting ready for the trip and stressed about leaving Jason in charge for more than 24 hours. I normally have some spotting for about 4 days before finally getting my period and that seemed to start the Wednesday before we left for Nashville. Great...I was going to have my period while at this fantastic event. During our time in Nashville, I scrapped with the divas, consumed way too much caffeine and drank about 2-3 beers every night. I had a great time!

The next Thursday, my mom and I went to the Keith Urban/Carrie Underwood. As we were waiting for the concert to begin (consuming a very large Bud Light), I joked around that my period never really came. Wouldn't it be funny if I were pregnant? No, not really. I just had xrays done on my back and hips and I signed a freakin waiver that said there was no way in hell I could possibly be pregnant. Besides...I was taking the pill. The subject was closed and I had another extra large Bud Light.

Friday morning I woke up with this nagging voice in my head. For some reason, it kept telling me to take a pregnancy test. I had absolutely no desire to go out and buy a pregnancy test since it would probably be a total waste of money. But wait! About 8 months ago, my period was late and I thought I may be pregnant so I bought a 2pack. I rummaged through the hallway closet and dug out that extra pregnancy test. I peed on the stick and went about my business getting the boys ready for the day. As I was getting the kids in the truck I remembered that stick waiting on the bathroom counter. I quickly ran in the house to look at the "negative" test. Wasn't I surprised to find the word "positive" in the results section. Way to go for digital pregnancy tests...I never could figure out the one line vs two line thing.

So I'm pregnant. I wanted to keep it quiet until after my 8 week visit on 5/13 with my doctor, but it's getting harder and harder. As the shock wears off, the excitement is settling in. Yesterday I saw my rheumatologist. I was concerned about being pregnant without taking any medication. I went through both of my other pregnancies on both prednisone and plaquenil and just assumed that he would put me back on something. Nope. I'm staying medication free for this pregnancy unless my symptoms should change. Yeah! They ran a full blood panel and took a urine sample as a "starting" point. Unless something comes up, I won't see my rheumatologist again until after the baby is born in December.

I've tried explaining to Ayden that he's going to have a brother or sister, but Ayden only wants a sister. He's wanted a sister for the longest time now and seriously thought we could buy one at Target...we buy everything else at Target so why not? I've decided to drop the subject for now.

Jason didn't take the news too well. He thought we were done. He thought we had two more years before both of the boys would be in school. Two more years and we could get a larger house, take more vacations, buy another vehicle. He's being a trooper though. After I took his face in my hands, looked him straight in the eyes and simply said "this is happening...there is no way to turn back now", he seemed to understand and start accepting.

Trust me...this baby is already so loved, it just came as a total surprise to us and we need some time for it to fully sink in. For me, it will sink in when I have my first ultrasound on the 13th and see baby whozit for the first time. The tears will sting my eyes and I'll have a happy smile on my face as I float out of the office. It may take Jason a bit longer, but he's such a good daddy to Ayden and Jameson so I know he'll be a good daddy to little whozit too.